Monday, September 19, 2011

I hope my guardian angel is doing tequila shots right now

Because they deserve them.  Today I nearly killed myself, most spectacularly.

Granted, the roads were very wet.  And I was accelerating outof standing water.  But I KNOW better than to gun the gas in those conditions, INTO a turn.  Yet I did it- and as my car spun into the curb once, then away twice (yes, 3 360 spins- across five lanes of traffic)- they only thing that popped into my head was "Oh HELL no, I do NOT have time for this."

There was no flash of my life before my eyes, no worry about would the baby and I be okay, no crying out to God.  I'm pretty sure he was already aware of what was going on, from the colorful cursing of whatever poor angel is assigned to riding herd on me.  Once I coasted into the parking lot across the street (for an automotive repair shop- THERE'S some funny for you)- I stopped long enough to be thankful I had dropped off the Daredevil and Gollum (my youngest- more on him later) approximately five minutes earlier at school.  Alienbaby kicked in protest at the tightened seatbelt (good little Kia, that belt grabbed me like I was a hot date on saturday night), and I doublechecked to make sure that none of the oncoming traffic had suffered collisions.  Miracle- no one had.  I didn't even get honked horns and fingers shoved out windows.  Kentucky folks are nice like that.

The scary thing is- I didn't even think about how close I had come to being roadkill.  I just pulled back out into traffic and puttered off (slowly, with my nerves a little jangled) to school.  I called Mark- because who else would I call that early in the morning but my insomniac friend- and gave him the short version.  By the time I did that, I was at school, and a few hours of staring blankly at the busy-work on my screen settled everything into a numb sort of blur.

Mommies (and anyone else out there)- check your tires.  Check your brakes.  And if you ever get a chance to meet your guardian angel- buy them a drink.  They deserve it.

1 comment:

  1. Wow, Erin's going to flip when I tell him about this. *blinks* Were your tires bald or something? Crap, and I thought me swerving and nearly hitting a car on the way from school (they didn't honk either, interestingly enough) was scary. Glad to hear you're okay. :(